|Austin-Bergstrom International Airport|
Trash Guitar Meets Kirk-O-Matic
by Trash Guitar
I met this Dreamer in Austin. He's been in the trenches for 20 years making no money and following his dream. The difference between him and me is that for those 20 years I got a "real Paying Job" because I got socked with child support payments. I held on to my dream all that time and in 2001 I started recording my first Music CD FINALLY.
I was writing songs when I met the Second Wife back in '80. She loved my music Until we got married. She nearly killed me and almost got me rubbed out by some of her Italian friends. She made me a Believer in the Mafia. So I got kicked out as daddy in 83 and went back home to MY mommy and daddy's apartment above the house.
I got some schooling and meanwhile I co-wrote, directed, acted and even did the Laugh Track for a 53 minute TV show on Access TV outside of Milwaukee (Menomonee Falls) . It was called Comedy in Our World. A Johnny Carson (that's Old) type thing. I even sang one of my songs: "Rock Star" (from my first CD which I finally recorded 18 years later). I was a hit with my family. They saw the show on TV - Unkel Tom You're on TV ! A big hit. And the tape was Lost.
But I gave it up = Cause There Was No Money in it - and I did Make that little Daughter of mine so it was only right that I PAID For my Daughters education, Braces etc. etc. etc. I've still got the closet full of suits and ties.
And NOW I'm having a Mid Life Crisis cause Little Daughter is 21 and I'm Still holding on to the Dream. I hit Nashville in 2002. They said GET OUT OF HERE. You're Rock 'n Roll. I played on stage at the TAXI AR Convention in LA last fall. Everyone knew me the Next Day. But NO Million Dollar Offer.
SO I hit Austin for SXSW and I run into Bruce Holliman; we're first in line to sign up and I hear about his movie he's trying to make. Well up walks this Crazy Dude, tells me his name is Kirk-O-Matic. My first thought is Veg-O-Matic and he's saying he'll make me a Music Video IF I let him use some of my Songs.
SO Kirk finally says, I'll reserve a studio. We'll do 4 songs on blue screen in two hours. You walk out with a Music Video and I get to use your songs for my project. A trade off. I'm thinking "Yeah Sure". Never happen. So Kirk walks off and I ask Bruce is this for real ? And Bruce says Kirk's done Tons of Stuff. Some of its REALLY GOOD.
So later in the SXSW week I see Kirk again and he tells me he's got the Studio reserved on Sunday, not this Sunday but next Sunday a Week Away, for two hours. Now I'm starting to get excited. I give him my 4 Song Anti-War CD and ask him to pick a song. He's still thinking about doing all 4 and I tell him I want Just One and Do It Right.
So I keep bumping into Kirk and Bruce through the next few days and we spend a Night Hitting ALL the Parties we can find. For some reason we can't get near the Free Food and Chicks keep coming up to me with the line "Aren't you so and so ?" And I'm handing out my Rock Card like it's an every day thing. Well it was in Austin ! I'm a Rock Star.
After 4 days Kirk Still hasn't listened to ANY of my songs. "I will, I will, he says." Then I meet the Metal Bra Guy AKA the Robot Guy and I'm getting this IDEA to put some robots in the Music Video. The Robot Guy says OK, I need some gas money cause I live in Arkansas or something.
I tell Kirk what I'm planning and he calls me Robert Rodreguez and I say "WHO"? And he thinks I'm joking.
So Now I've got 6 more days before the shoot and I'm calling Bruce and Kirk and they're not returning my calls and the Robot Guy May or May Not Bring some props and I don't see Bruce or Kirk any more cause now it's the Music portion of SXSW and I'm wondering IS THIS FOR REAL OR NOT ?
Some time in the mess I go to this radio station and talk to Pieces of Peace - Rodney on 5th street and I get on his talk show cause the actress from Dirt is late for her interview. Rodney's good friend just died and he asks me which song of the 4 that he has would be good for such an occasion. (actually None are) And I say Camera In the Sky. So there I was in Austin for 4 days and I'm On The Radio and I'm Preaching Against the War. Unbelievable. I'm a Big Star in Austin.
Then I meet Brian (B-Doe) and Gary Garza and I get Interviewed LIVE on Austin Music Network. Again I'm Preaching Against the War. They haven't even heard my music and I'm ON TV. And I tell them Kirk-O-Matic is Making Me A Music Video. Oh If Mom was still here she'd be so proud ! I'm way over my 15 minutes of fame. Maybe I'm Big League !
So after that I figure I'd better go see if I can find this TV Studio Kirk told me to show up at on Sunday and Make Sure It Is Real. I get lost in the Other Side of the Tracks and stumble into a Fire Station asking for help to get to the Studio. I'm SO Far Away From the Studio the Firemen were really jumpy. They looked at this Funky Rock 'n Roller with the little chin beard, 1970's White Johnny Winter Hair and they were Puzzled, Paranoid, put on the gas masks and got out the map.
And what a Relief to Find I was on the right road but at the Wrong end. There WAS a REAL TV Studio Somewhere East of Austin's Downtown. A Real Nice Building - Indoor Plumbing and Everything on that side of town. And I meet Travis at the front desk and he knows Kirk and WOW - This Might Just Happen.
The reason I'm a little jumpy and nervous about all this is because EVERY Time I mention to someone that Kirk-O-Matic is Making Me A Music Video of one of my songs; I get NO REACTION. They don't say; "Yeah I know him". Or "Yeah, he's a good guy". Or "He's a %@*&". No, they just look at me and say; "Uh Huh" . Guess they were jealous. Or Unbelievers or AFRAID TO TRY TO CRUSH MY DREAM. I was going to do a Music Video with Mr. PERSISTENCE HIMSELF ! Only I didn't even know who he was !
SO I Try Kirk's phone One More Time and in the middle of Voice Mail, he picks up and tells me that he didn't call back cause I didn't leave my number. Well, where I come from, there is ALWAYS Caller ID. I've not used to the Southern Comfort type of thinking. (And I hear the same thing from Bruce. He didn't have my number either) So Kirk finally tells me He thinks we should do Camera In The Sky as the Music Video. . And I'm thinking Camera In the Sky, "I'll Practice Lip Syncing it."
But that night I ran into this "honey" that just totally Distracted me from My Lip Sync Rehearsal - of the song that is.
So on Sunday afternoon, we get into the Studio and it takes an hour to get the lighting and I'm Lip Syncing the song over and over and the guy who had the studio before us says "Who IS That ?" And Kirk points at me and says "Trash Guitar", and I say "Why do you ask?" And he says "You're GOOD." ha ha ha. This is was guy doing a show before us. And the Guy using the studio after us likes it too ! YES !
Now I'm all set and the Robot Guy DOES SHOW UP and brings The Coolest Female Robot. And this other stuff. And Holliman shows up too and runs the camera while Kirk is doing video tricks in the back room. So we did some takes on Blue Screen and I SUDDENLY REALIZE I can't Lip Sync for #*@&. And I'm melting under the lights. I've got these "killer" glasses from the Robot Guy, the Rock Star Look, and And We're Having Fun and Kirk is running around Directing and yelling at Bruce. And the Robot Guy is Moving the robot around and his other props too. And he almost gets electrocuted with one of his toys. Bruce is giving me the marks on the floor and moving the cameras all over.
I was a BIG STAR. Way more than 15 Minutes of Attention. And they were all very gracious cause I was so lousy and they didn't even tell me so. I guess that's just Austin Folks for you.
And anyhow we got some good footage and now Kirks editing all kinds of stuff and a after dozen emails back and forth, I am beginning to understand I LUCKED OUT. And Kirk and Bruce and the Robot Guy are a Whole Lot Like Me. Dreamers - Way Out There - Late Bloomers. And Now We've made this into First Rate Music Video - I KNOW THIS IS THE BIG ONE -I'm preaching to Kirk about how great I am - MUSIC VIDEO.
Anyhow it passed my family's test. My rock 'n roll nephew was yelling out all these Big Rock Star Names as he watched it. I got compared to SOME OF THE GREATS. The rest of the family was the Quietest I Ever Saw Them. They asked some good questions and I'm pretty sure they were SHOCKED AND AWED in a nice sort of way.
Well, there it is. What a time I had in Austin at my First, Better Late Than Never, Trip to SXSW. I think it was Productive.
SO Watch Out Austin. There's a NEW - EXCITING BIG SCREEN Kirk-O-Matic and Friends Production of Trash Guitar's Smash Hit - Camera In The Sky - and IT'S COMING YOUR WAY THIS MAY on ACTV AND AUSTIN MUSIC STATION. Don't miss it. And Send Money so we can do some more.
Thank You Austin. Wishing you peace and love always,